Thursday, September 10, 2015

A Trip to the Zoo

On Monday we decided to take a trip to Ashboro to North Carolina Zoo. Readers with really good memories and Kevin know that I won't stop bitching about wanting to see an octopus or a squid at a zoo/aquarium. I've been to 4 zoos in the last 2 years and can not see a dang squid no matter were I go. Kev might be getting a little tired of hearing me talk about it... but I'd stop if I could just see an octopus.

I did ask the front desk attendant if there was an octopus. He said no, Kevin let out a pained sigh and we walked in the zoo.

I thought it would be cool to recap some of the things I saw at the zoo on Labor Day. I have to tell you , the animals were really on point.

It's a bear! The last time I went to a zoo, all I saw were the backsides of the animals. It was awesome...

More bear!

Behold the majestic buffalo.

And the majestic elk

Not an actual picture but I did see several fanny packs at the zoo. Horrible, awful, unflattering fanny packs. I was told they were coming back in style and I didn't want to believe it. Top 10 least flattering things someone can wear.

This Grizzly Bear was HUGE. Seriously, that bear didn't play. While I was standing there, I overheard a dad not paying attention at all to what his 5 year old was asking him. I'm pretty sure this is how kids get traumatized for life. Here's how the conversation went.
Kid - If people fall over the ledge will the grizzly bear eat them?
Dad - Yes
Kid - If it were 3 people would the bear eat all of them?
Dad - Yes
Kid - Would the bear leave nothing but the bones?
Dad - Yes

Well played dad, well played.

We were walking toward the next exhibit and I saw a 60 year old woman lounging on a bench in these.

Except they were a white base and she had on a white button up shirt on underneath. It was Labor Day. I guess there aren't many occasions to wear something that spectacular. If you have to choose a day, why not Labor day?

Then we wandered into an exhibit of things in the desert and I saw these turtle / tortoises and their nice salad.

Seriously, that's a great salad. There might even be croutons in there. The salad I got at the zoo cafe didn't look nearly that good.

Moving on...

Lace edge bike shorts. I saw a woman wearing lace-edged bike shorts. I wore these in the 7th grade and they're back. Between these shorts, the fanny pack and the flag overalls, I might have stepped into a small time warp. 

Yes it is.

The lions and ocelots were sleeping. Kev was a little bummed and I told him that regardless of size, it's still a cat. Cats sleep all the time and have a tendency to be jerks. But look a that cute kitty face! Awwww....

Then we found some sleeping gorillas.

But the 'best' think I saw was a grandpa feeding a one year old sips of Mt Dew.

Seriously?!?!?! WTF are you doing giving a baby Mountain Dew??? Give the kid water or maybe even a juice, but the most awful of caffeinated, carbonated beverages full of noting but crap?? Ugh. I really wanted to slap it out of his hand. But then there'd be a fight and Kevin would have to hold me back... nothing good would come from it.

Instead I amused my self by looking at the elephants.

Peaceful, non Mt Dew drinking elephants.

The last stop was at the giraffes. There were 3 that walked by and there was a little boy standing next to me who asked a few times if that was a boy or a girl. I thought he was talking to someone else and then he said, "Hey, I'm talking to you". (He was maybe 6).

I told him this one was a boy because he was bigger than the others. I couldn't tell him it was because of his massive giraffe man-parts... But perhaps I should have since I'd never see the kid again.

And that folks was my trip to the zoo!

On a completely side note, I was looking up pumpkin spice memes for a team email and I felt the need to share my 2 favorites.

more hahaha

One more thing, Congrats to NANCY P. for winning my giveaway! I already emailed you, please send me your address and I'll get it in the mail to you.

Thanks to everyone who participated!


  1. I'm sorry - I'm loving more of what you say, non-animal related then anything else :)
    I have heard from multiple people that fanny packs are coming back... with over alls... WHY GOD ... WHY?!!?!?

    1. Last spring the sorority bought a bunch of neon fanny packs for their Senior night and I didn't understand. THEN at convention this summer they told me they were sad that they couldn't find fanny packs for Disney, I can't even....

  2. She really was lounging though. lol She was legs crossed leaning back and stretched out on the bench. I died.

  3. She really was lounging though. lol She was legs crossed leaning back and stretched out on the bench. I died.